Last night, disaster (or so it seemed) struck. I was texting a guy I happen to like very much and naturally I wanted to share the cuteness with my friends. So I screenshot the conversation but instead of sending it to my friend I SEND IT TO HIM. The inevitable “oh f***” moment followed, succeeded by a panicked phone call to my best friend. You see, I have the ability to remain calm and composed in most situations. In an actual crisis, you want me on your side. Yet, when it comes to me sending the wrong text to the wrong person, I become an anxiety-driven mess. Why is that? The message in the screenshot itself was perfectly fine–nothing embarrassing or ridiculous. My “save” message was of course awkward, but still not horrible. No, what it all boils down to is fear. Fear of making a mistake, fear of seeming like I care too much or am crazy, and, greatest of all, fear of being rejected. All Of this because of a silly screenshot. So, what now? I’ve gotten right down to it. It’s not always the action itself that upsets us, it’s the memories and emotions that the action can stir up. Do I wish it hadn’t happened? Yes. Was is embarrassing? Hell yes. However, it’s done. We beat ourselves up all of the time over things we should’ve done, things we shouldn’t have done, and add so much stress to our lives by worrying about possibly losing the approval of others. Where does it end? Unfortunately, I don’t have all of the answers for you. I only hope that by being more aware of what’s behind the instant anxiety and trying to work through it I can one day not let my fears take such easy control over me, even if it was for a short time. I am human. You are human. We are going to screw up sometimes, but we are doing our best. Right now, the entire thing seems trivial and silly, especially since this guy took it quite well and overlooked it. Be gentle with yourselves darlings and try to find humor in ridiculous situations. Surprisingly enough, the world doesn’t end just because you sent a cute guy a screenshot of your own conversation with him.